Sunday, September 1, 2013

Prisoners Of Doctor Doom!

We meet once again, you craven carrion.

It may surprise some of you that, from time to time, even Doom finds himself with, as you Americans say, "time to kill," and it is indeed time itself that has brought about this intrusion into the digital musings of the one you know as Comicsfan--for I have noticed that, among all of his references to Doctor Doom, there has yet been no mention of my earliest encounter with the quartet of adventurers the world has come to know as the Fantastic Four. As many of you are aware, it was that meeting that first brought Doom to the attention of the western world, and in particular the odd but widespread fictional medium of "comic books"--and it seems only appropriate that this, eh, "blog" should include the details of that world-shaking event. And who better to enlighten you than Doom, himself?

Thus, I have abducted invited Comicsfan to be my guest in my castle's rather famous dungeon sub-chambers which have been enjoyed by the unfortunate more privileged guests who have earned my wrath favor, so that I may offer my services to finally bring you the details of the famous tale of Doom's first meeting with Richards and his costumed associates. And you will indeed find that time played a crucial role in that meeting. But a word to the wise: do not seek to question the accuracy of my report of this account. Or you, too, could become:

First, I must congratulate the artist Jack Kirby on his artistic interpretation of that famous first meeting, as it well represents the confusion and helplessness that the Fantastic Four no doubt felt in their dealings with their new and formidable foe, one quite unlike any other they had faced in their short career. They do seem at a loss as to how to deal with my strategies, do they not? Kirby, I am told, went on to a distinguished career in comics art--and while his achievements could never hope to equal my own, with work such as this I can understand the accolades that would no doubt be showered upon him. You'll note that there are several covers like this one where Kirby scaled Doom much larger than those who would seek to oppose me--which is not only appropriate, but certainly an indication of the importance of Doom's stature in the eyes of not only the Fantastic Four but also of their readers.

Now, to the story. I must point out that many of you have an impression of Richards and his group as being a unique group of adventurers whose abilities and dedication were deservedly celebrated worldwide. Yet I submit to you that, at least in this stage of their "fame," they were little more than squabbling fools:

Indeed, could a super-team of such presumed skill and fortitude be ensnared so easily--their entire headquarters captured in a humiliating display seen throughout the city?

And as you can see, even the sound of my voice gave Richards pause, and with good reason:

Richards. He and I would go on to have our private war with each other in countless more encounters, all going back to the incident at State University where my efforts to contact the nether world met with a setback. Though "war" is perhaps an overstatement of our differences. Richards no doubt regarded me as a rival to be confronted and stymied whenever the opportunity arose--whereas from my perspective, I would have casually disregarded him had his activities not interfered with my plans.

And so, from the start, Doom was in control of this first meeting--a virtual puppetmaster dealing with puppets. I managed to acquire the Invisible Girl as a hostage, and then transported the four to my castle in order to issue my demands:

Naturally, simply the fact that I created a time travel device would have sufficiently humbled Richards--but he was merely a means to an end. The cretin never bothered to wonder what need Doom would have for mere pirated treasure. Yet for you, I can fully disclose my reasons for wanting these particular valuables:

So, off they went on their fool's errand. I shall spare you the trio's dealings with the sea-faring 18th century clods they encountered in their quest to confiscate the treasure chest. Rather, let us simply rejoin them upon their return, though I would discover it to be fraught with treachery:

Richards, in an effort to subvert my original instructions, was making the point that I wished to have the treasure chest, while specifying no desire to have the treasure itself--a blatant lie, since I had made it quite clear (and specified as much) that it was the treasure I was sending them to retrieve. But where others argue niggling specifics, Doom instead takes his revenge--which begins after a laughable attempt by the Thing to strike my person:

An ingenious trap indeed for these bumblers. And this early encounter with the Fantastic Four might well have seen the end of their nascent career, had it not been for an invisible fourth member who managed (incredibly) to take Doom unawares and then free her cohorts:

It then fell to the Human Torch to surround my castle with flame in order to force me out like some common rabble. Yet Doom is no novice to be flushed out of his stronghold thus--and with my plan at an end, I felt obliged to engage a contingency measure:

And thus the account of that first fateful meeting comes to an end. Naturally, it would not be long before Doom would once again have the Fantastic Four reeling in confusion and helplessness--but, hopefully, your friend Comicsfan will have occasion to relate that story to you before my intervention is again warranted. I shall return him to your care once his stay in my land is concluded--assuming of course that he is able he wishes to depart. It's quite rare for someone to wish to leave Latveria, as my people are always happy and uncomplaining. Fortunately, at least where his blogging is concerned, I can provide him with "Wi-Fi."


Anonymous said...

Your excellency;
Please note that while I have mocked many so-called superheroes and supervillians in the comment section of this blog, I did it only knowing that you only allowed these cretins to live so that they may someday be of some small use in your plans. I have always been loyal to your greatness. If you see fit to allow Comicsfan to continue to publish and yea, survive, we will be eager tools in your designs for world conquest.
On the otherhand, if that lackey has outlived his usefulness, so be it. we're really not that close. I never trusted him anyway.
Awaiting your commands, my liege, M.P.
P.S...I Have this little credit card thing..just a misunderstanding really...if you could send some robots .no, no..forget I mentioned please AAAHHH

Comicsfan said...

Welcome to the dungeon. Can I get you some gruel?